It seemed to have started about 7:30pm. I was browsing around on my laptop here in bed when I felt blood suddenly spill out. I've been constantly bleeding now for months but this was the fast gushing kind, which hasn't happened since the night we had our huge scare in the hospital. I can't explain the emotional feeling that came at that exact moment, but I can tell you I was terrified to look down and see what color it was. I was praying it was dark brown as it has been lately; that's a good sign of healing. Although I knew it couldn't be by the amount I was losing. We've done this before and we knew the drill. On the way to the hospital, I was cramping and having some pain. Actually I was feeling that discomfort most of the day and called Gordon to make an ultrasound too. I'm telling you my heart always know when something is wrong. Last time I didn't cramp up while I bled and the combination of the two is about the worst feeling in the world. Yet I was surprisingly calm this time around.
The Doctor wanted to run all kinds of tests. First I needed to urinate in a cup to test for UTI and bacteria causing the hemorrhage. My sample was so concentrated with blood they couldn't get any results. So we resorted to using a catheter. They also gave me an IV with a needle large enough in case they needed to do a blood transfusion. After what seemed like forever, we
finally got an ultrasound and shockingly there they were! Our two babies with heartbeats and active as can be. One was punching the air and the other was swimming circles. We even got to find out the sex!!!! BUT we're not telling yet only because he wasn't 100% sure. Let's just say I was totally surprised!! The new hemorrhage is a pretty good size and only time can heal and answer questions.
It really blew my mind to see the minies happy as little clams. Each week that goes by, they get stronger and my confidence raises a bit higher. It's such a delicate process and emotional ride. Shane and I are home now and I'm back to stage 3 bedrest until it heals....approximately a few months they say. It's getting seriously difficult being in bed all day and night, it truly is one of the hardest things I've ever done. Then I have small moments when I picture my future or remember what fighters I have growing and I smile. A mom would do anything for her children and I'm already catching a glimpes of that. This, in the long run, is worth my battle.
July 16, 2008
Another Restless Night
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20 comments:
Wow, you continue to amaze me Truly, the two little ones could not ask for a more devoted Mommy! You are unbelievable-We love you both!
So happy to hear they are still there!! Let me know if you need a visit!!
Truly I am so happy to hear that they are doing great and as active as can be. It is amazing how a mom would do anything for her children, it starts even before they are born. You are going to be a great mom. Hang in there, I am sure its soooo hard to be in bed all day. You are just resting up for when they arrive, because you will need your energy then. Take care, talk to you soon.
I'm so happy to hear that everything is okay with the minies. I'm sorry that you're still on bed rest, I would go crazy!! There's only so many books you can read, and so many things you can search online and so many movies to watch.
This is so crazy but you are going to be ok. I always check your blog to see if anything is new and always hope I see good news on here. Hang in there. No matter what conflicts you are having now it will be more than worth it when it's all over. When you see their sweet faces your heart will melt. Having children is a joy that nobody can explain to you but it looks like you will find that out for yourself soon enough. You are in my thoughts and prayers always. Hang in there!!
Props go to you for staying in bed all this time. We keep praying for you guys!!!!! I am so excited to meet these little twins.
Truly Truly Truly - You Truly are amazing. Hearing your story makes me ashamed for complaining about anything while being pregnant. Heavenly Father told Adam and Eve that the ground is cursed for our sake. I have pondered that scripture many times and it has become one of my favorite in times of hardship or struggle. Everything we go through is for our sake. God is preparing us for godhood and he is definitely shaping you with patience and faith, two very godly traits ;) I love you and as I said before your story has been strengthening my testimony about trials and enduring them. Hang on and know a lot of people are praying for you and your babies.
Here is my guess... BOY AND GIRL!!
Hey Tru, sorry to hear about the long bedrest again. You are right though, it will be well worth it! I wish I could come visit and we could lay in bed and laugh about Orem memories. Here are some to get you laughing..."It's like the Wizard of Oz out there!" "EFF YOU TRULY!" (said by Marky :-)) "Carl Unex!" "This isn't a freakin dorm!" SO much fun! Anyway, take care and tell us what those babies are...I am dying to know!!!!!!!!!!
Dangit and Hooray!!! I'm so glad that you and the bebes and Shane are ok. I'm sad you're stuck in bed again but I know when the babies come you will laugh at how WORTH IT it was :) AND oh my gosh! I neeeed to know the sexes! When will you tell? Love you! xoxo
Truly- I can't believe everything you've been through! Julie Spahr told me to check out your blog and I'm so glad I did... I feel like we don't hear about anything now that Keefers isn't around. You have such amazing strength! Thanks for sharing your story, and like someone else said, and they weren't kidding- you really do need all the rest you can get now, because you won't be getting it ever again!
Truly you are amazing! I cannot tell you how in awe I am of you. I know it is so hard but you are right, it is worth every second of it. I am so glad to hear that your little miracles are still fighting and doing well. I cannot wait to hear what they are?!?!? Please keep us posted. I think of you every day and pray things continue to go well.
Hi, my name is Nicole. I came across your blog from LeDawn's blog (you made a comment about the "hater" on her blog.
I usually think it is a bit strange when people I don't know write on my blog, but I had to comment. First, I want to say congratulations -- how exciting that you are pregnant! That is so awesome that you are having twins!! Gosh, it must be so tough to be on bed rest for months on end. I can;t believe all that you have been through over the past few months. You must be a really strong person!
I just want you to know that my mom had similar complications when she was pregnant with me. She had 4 kids and they put her on bedrest...imagine that! Anyway, it is such a selfless thing to stay in bed for those babies. I wouldn't know life as I do today if it wasn't for her staying on bed rest to get me here.
I am sitting here right now praying to know what I can say to help you understand the amount of respect I have for you and your deep desire to be a mother. It is such an amazing thing to be a mother. I feel like it is truly an amazing calling. I pray that things will go well for you and your little growing family.
P.S. don't go private -- your blogs are inspiring to read!
Always thinking about you two and your growing babies! So amazed that you've been able to be so calm through all these unfortunate events. Hang in there!!
Love Emily
Don't hold out on us...what are you having?! :) I think it's so cool that you're having twins...and I'm so glad to hear that you and the babies (and Shane) are all doing well. I've seriously been praying for you. Keep up the good attitude, and I know it is hard, but try to enjoy this time of rest. You'll have your hands full when your active twins arrive :)
K- you are definitely one strong spirit Truly! I can only begin to imagine the emoitons that go through your mind, body and soul and to just be holding on by faith and knowing that this is in the Lords hands and that you are strong enough to get through this is something that only if you were to go through it like yourself knowone would ever understand. I'm glad your spirits are high and you have a loving and supporting husband and family that comfort you daily! We will keep you guys in our prayers! Hang in there!
oh ya and my Aunt just recently had twins and had to go on bedrest for like 3 or 4 months just the last part but something that if you're bored and into making cards you could make thank you cards, birthday cards, christmas cards, etc... just an idea. My Aunt said that it kept her busy for a while. Just have someone go and get you cute scrapbooking paper cute ribbon maybe some cute embelishments and then you're set to go :) Another thing you could maybe do is learn how to knit and make yourself some scarfs and hats. just an idea!
Truly Bug, Well, I can't tell you how relieved Dad and I were when we heard the babies were still hanging in there. This has been, and continues to be the most unbelievable roller coaster ride. I can only imagine how hard it is for you and Shane. Hang in there. It will be worth it, just like everyone else has said. Lots of prayers are being offered on your behalf by people you don't even know. So many are pulling for you and Shane and the babies! Love you, Mom
I keep checking in on you 4. We keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
Keep those babes cookin. I'd love some belly shots.
Oh my, living away I don't hear about anyone. I didn't even know you were having trouble. I'm so glad to hear that you are o.k., and so are the twins. You are so awesome. We will pray for you everyday. Stay in Bed!!!!
It's good to hear you are ok! Let me know if you need anything! I want to know asap what you are having!!!
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